Jules’s Registered & Protected Web Page
http://meangirlgarage.blogspot.com/-
All Rights Reserved
-
Fri Jan 22 23:01:48 UTC 2010
-
Mean Girl Garage
-
http://meangirlgarage.blogspot.com/ Protected on 2010-01-22 23:01:48 UTC
-
skip to main | skip to sidebar Thursday, January 21, 2010 Blasphemy is Funny Don't lie. You know it is. I mean, if you believe in it. Otherwise, it's not blasphemy. It's just funny. Anyway, go watch Midget Man of Steel's vlogs. Because he's funny. Posted by Jules at 7:21 PM 11 comments Labels: bloggers, god Wednesday, January 20, 2010 'Out of Tune Idol' Week 3 Results Show The votes have been counted.Dreich and Jules, will you please come to the center of the stage.Dreich -Veg Ass said that it was horribly fascinating in the same way a car crash is horribly fascinating. You drive past all slow and you don't WANT to look but you can't help it, you have to know if it's nasty and bloody and icky.BeckEye wanted to know how many of Jules' pills you popped before taking the stage.What did the audience think?They think your killer bunny was one for the records! Let's hear you do some ABBA!Jules - JennyMac said that you have the couture de glitterati.Dingo said...well, nothing. She's off fighting zombies.How did the audience feel?They feel like your little ho-ish self should sing some ABBA!!Little Ms. Blogger, Otin, and Maggie, please come to the center of the stage.Little Ms. Blogger -Veg Ass gave you extra points for covering Bread - a band my mother hero worships therefore, by default, I spent my childhood despising. JennyMac said that while listening to this week's offering from Beaker, our cat begged me for a razor blade to end her life.Otin -Miss Yvonne said....um.....I don't know...I think she's still drunk.JennyMac said that she was so happy to see the man behind the half naked doll!Maggie - Veg Ass said that Don Henley would totally masturbate to this. Some hot blonde in a tube top singing his song? Yes please. BeckEye said you've finally surpassed Imaho in presentations! That's the best use of cheap wine and Herman Munster that I've seen since that one night in college. Ahhh, memories.Unfortunately, one of you must leave us today. What did the audience think?Maggie, it's time for us to say goodbye. But as a departing gift, we do have these lovely BLING glasses for you!!! Just email me your address and they are ALL yours!! Remember next week's theme is ABBA songs! Posted by Jules at 9:32 PM 17 comments Labels: Out of Tune Idol Dear President Obama/My Man, Dearest President Obama/My Man, You know I adore you. You know I canvassed for you. In the winter. In the ghetto. In the snow. In the cold. For four hours. Then I did it again. In the heat. For another four hours. So, obviously, I love you. And I've stood up for you when perhaps you didn't really even deserve it. I keep telling people you need more time (which I do think is valid, I mean, how much do any of us really accomplish in a year?). But there's always been this one sticking point with us. You know what it is. Yep. It's your Education Plan. I know Charter Schools have worked in some locations. I know they were successful in Chicago and have been in NYC. But where I live, they are a disaster. For instance, I have a girl in my class who is reading at a first grade, eighth month level. She came in September from a charter school. She's been in charter schools since first grade. The charter schools have been telling her mom that she's right on target. She's clearly not. She's puts. periods in the. middle of sentences. for no apparent. reason. This is not where she should be in the fifth grade. AND the charter schools in my area ALWAYS test lower on the state test than the public schools do. This success does not make, Mr. President. Then, to add insult to injury, you are a proponent of Merit Pay for Teachers. Really? Really. You want some of MY money to be given to me based on how my students do on a test on a given day? Let's think about this for a moment. If you are a parent, think of the times that your child has said something that you taught them not to say. Or think of the times that you've gone over something with your child for a test. They knew it inside out. They get the test back and got it wrong. Do you think YOU should be held accountable for that? Then why should I? I can't tell you what these kids think at any given time. Add to that, that some of them come from very dysfunctional homes. I have no control over if there was a fight in the home that morning and it is weighing on the student's mind. Or if the student has a headache. Or if the student ate breakfast. There are too many variables that go into it for MY pay to be based on a test that is taken on ONE day. Or over the course of a week. So when I see that my state and my school have agreed to your plan, 'Race to the Top,' which when people read in the news, they'll think it's simple. But if they really read it, they'll see there are a lot of strings attached to this money. One of which, is test scores being linked to how I am evaluated as a teacher. Damn, I hope my students eat their breakfasts that day. Yours Truly, Jules Posted by Jules at 6:04 AM 23 comments Labels: education, Obama, testing Tuesday, January 19, 2010 'Out of Tune Idol' Week 3! Welcome to Week 3 of 'Out of Tune Idol'! Let's say a big hello to our judges! First up is Dingo from As I Was Saying! She picked our fantastic theme this week, slow ballads from the 70's. Thanks for that Dingo! THEN, evidently, zombies must have taken her away because I haven't heard from her since. Hmmmm....... Next, give a warm welcome to the wonderful Miss Yvonne from Yo Mama's Blog, who seems to be MIA as a judge from her drunken birthday week! We hope you had a great birthday!! Say hello to the always sassy Veg Ass from The Vegetable Assassin! I can't wait to hear what she has to say this week!! And give some love to the magnificent BeckEye from The PopEye! I'm sure she's had a busy weekend with all of her celebrity coverings!! And finally, give a warm welcome to our Southern Belle, JennyMac from Let's Have a Cocktail. I'm pretty sure she needed some cocktails to listen to this week's entries! Last week, we had to get rid of the wonderful LiLu. She did walk away with a fantastic feather boa though!This week, first on stage is Maggie:Veg Ass - Someone had to the 'Hotel California'. It's practically illegal not to. My thoughts? Don Henley would totally masturbate to this. Some hot blonde in a tube top singing his song? Yes please. Nice props, Maggie. The Frankenstein monster fitted in with the 'creepy hotel' vibe nicely. Nice attempt to fit the video to the song with wine and the candles. However, I say it every week - Maggie is too good at holding a tune for this competition. She sings IN tune. In fact, she's the only contestant who can hold a tune legitimately, but she makes the best videos so hey, make up your own minds.BeckEye - I really have no opinion on the singing. I must confess to not being able to hear anything since I poked my eardrums out during Dreich's song. But you've finally surpassed Imaho in presentations! That's the best use of cheap wine and Herman Munster that I've seen since that one night in college. Ahhh, memories.JennyMac - Excellent song choice in a category that really frightened me. That shiny disco ball microphone is really quite fetching . But like many 70's rockers, did your blonde bombshell take some qualudes? Because she does NOT move. Although her hairdo is smashing. Thankfully I do not see the beehive make its presence known since week one. Perhaps too much ruinite? Ruinite on ice...so nice. Not only are you not out of tune, hands down, BEST PROPS.Next up on stage is Otin: Veg Ass - Steroid Otie has wasted by the looks of things and sat this one out, leaving Otie senior to dow the honours. I gave him points before he even started for wearing a Yankees t-shirt. I'm a judge, I can do whatever I want so everyone can suck it. Also, points for ruining one of my secret favourite seventies' songs - "Fire and Rain". Not sure I'd class James Taylor as "soft rock" either , but hey. Artistic license and all that. And to Otie's credit, it IS out of tune. Crazy out of tune for the most part. Sounded like a sailor on weekend leave after a whisky binge in a dockside whorehouse. Bonus points because I giggled to myself the entire way through imagining he was Stevie Wonder playing a piano just out of shot in his crazy shades. Watch it again and you'll see what I mean. Too bad my ears bled. Splendidly nasty.Beckeye - Couldn't see the video, but I'm sure it was stunning.JennyMac - Will the real Steroid Otie please stand up, please stand up, please stand up? Except , I am certainly not accusing you of illegal muscle enhancing drug use. So happy to see the man behind the half naked doll. LOVE LOVE LOVE the song. One of my all time fave James Taylor hits. And the NY Yankees paraphernalia? EXTA CREDIT! Your will have to do something to make up for not wearing a kilt though...just saying.Now on stage, Jules: Veg Ass - Firstly Jules, this is not what I'd class as a "soft rock" ballad, however it IS from the seventies and it IS our of tune therefore, I guess I'll overlook your genre flaw. I'm not sure why Imaho is waving a phone around - a bottle of gin and her panties might make more sense if she's so heartbroken and trying to woo back Cool Convertible Dude, who's sitting there all blase going, "I. Do. Not. Even. Know. You. Wench." He just sits there listening to her wailing like Lindsay Lohan after she realizes she left all of her coke stash on her last suitor's penis. You know that feeling when you've crossed that invisible line between being a happy drunk and a weepy, bobby, sad drunk? Guess what side of the line this is on?BeckEye - How many of those pills did you pop before taking the stage? I haven't heard a more emotionless delivery since Paris Hilton's "Stars Are Blind." I guess it could have something to do with the fact that you're begging a gay, anatomically incorrect dude to come back. Next time, pick a better muse.Jenny Mac - I swear Imaho has the couture de glitterati. Once again, best dressed. Once again, best hair. And how much does big blonde manbo (man bimbo) Charles or Chaz (because it is certainly NOT KEN in that car) love you Imaho with all your sparkles and pills. Although, he clearly does use quite a few of those pills too because that car is hideous. Great song choice and really, you are the puppet master with the sleek black cloak.Now performing, Little Ms. Blogger:Veg Ass - This starts off really well with the lights hitting Beaker like the search lights of an FBI helicopter illuminating a psycho butcher in the midst of a bloody rampage. So points for that. Extra points for covering Bread - a band my mother hero worships therefore, by default, I spent my childhood despising. Now I'll admit they have a few actually quite nice songs. This however, is not one of them, which is encouraging, plus the idea of Beaker "making it" with anyone is just something I can't afford therapy for. I don't want to say this was hideously our of tune, however, I just looked out my window and there were about 200 salivating alleycats looking back at me in expectations. Well done Ms. B. I think you'll make it through.BeckEye - Wow. Um, you took the words right our of my mouth It must have been while you were blowing my mind.JennyMac - I love that Beaker is under duress and totally admits it. I that Beaker's Director, Little Ms. Blogger, called it "Crappy 70's Ballad"....because is there ANY other kind? I am down with the smoky and mysterious environment. However, while listening to this week's offering from Beaker, our cat begged me for a razor blade to end her life. I declined. In all seriousness, my Hub asked me, "WTF are you listening to..." I said, "Beaker come on. As if you didn't Beaker could rock some Afternoon Delight."And finally, Dreich:Veg Ass - I was almost scared to press play on this since darkness had fallen already, but I'm happy I did because if you thought weeks one and two of Dreich's "special" renditions were erring a bit of the side of someone whose sanity is not firing on all cylinders, just wait till you hear his Meatloaf. I have to admit, this was horribly fascinating in the same way a car crash is horribly fascinating. You drive past all slow and you son't WANT to look but you can't help it, you have to know if it's nasty and bloody and icky. This made me want to hide at the back of my wardrobe with a carving knife. It's a sort of random, creepy selection of pictures and text and it alternates between speaking/yelling lyrics, singling like a man having his knackers tickled with a feather and downright psychotic rambling. And let's not even talk about the giant Microsoft Paint Mouse a couple of minutes in, which appears to be tearing a giant pumpkin head off of a...I don't even know what it is but it made me laugh out loud. And then lock all my doors. And install a deadbolt. This HAS to go through to round 4 because holy FUCK, this is unlike anything I've ever heard, anywhere in nature, ever before. It's the ramblings of a madman who is possibly singing to his machete.BeckEye - How many of Jules' pills did you pop before taking the stage? This is no way to treat a brilliant blinding light from Heaven like Jim Steinman. I think if someone had taken the words right out of your mouth, this performance would have actually been tolerable.JennyMac - Thank God this came with a warning hence I think that I woke up after accidentally ingesting deathly amounts of acid. I felt like I was being tricked that it would be a 'good trip' because of the pretty pictures. Pardon me while while I place a hot needle through my temple to compensate for what I have just endured...So there you have it! You have until Wednesday at noon to cast your votes! And next week's theme is ABBA songs!!! Posted by Jules at 6:16 AM 50 comments Labels: Out of Tune Idol Monday, January 18, 2010 Because I'm TOTALLY Lazy.... If you've never been to see Elly over at Buggin Word, you should go. She's totally funny! Anyway, she tagged me in a meme and since I'm completely lazy today (although I did workout with the Wii and get lost on the island bicycling around...), I'm going to do it. So, evidently, she'd like to know 10 things about me (those of you who've been reading awhile probably wish I'd just shut up, but you don't get a say...). So here goes: 1. I cry every time I think about Hubby and I being separated by death. That means when I watched 'Up' I cried. When I listen to stupid country songs, I cry. You name it, if the couple has been together for awhile and they are separated by death, I cry. Hubby makes fun of me. He made fun of me when I tried to tell him this morning how sweet Mo'Nique's speech was last night and I started crying. It sucks. I guess it just means I love him. Or I have something wrong with my tear duct. 2. I got up yesterday morning, ate breakfast, watched "Meet the Press", then went back to sleep for another hour. I loved it. 3. If I could hibernate right now for about a month, I'd be one happy girl. 4. I took the ornaments off our Christmas tree, but Hubby liked the tree up with just the lights, so up it stays. 5. A parent told my principal that she thinks I don't like her son and that I am judgmental of her parenting skills. I told my principal that the parent is right. 6. I loved being a kid. Being a grown-up is just so-so. 7. Each day, I hate being cold more and more. But I can't decide where I want to move, so I stay in this cold place. 8. I have finally found a favorite bottle of chardonnay and a favorite bottle of cabernet. Hubby and I buy them up like crazy. 9. I really like have a lot of breaks in the year and having summers off, but being a teacher pretty much sucks. 10. The amount of stupid people in the world seems to be growing. And it is getting more and more on my nerves each day. So there you have it. Not too deep today.... Like I said, I'm cold, tired, and lazy. So lazy in fact that I'm not even tagging five people! I know!!! CRAZY!! Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day, Everyone! Posted by Jules at 2:18 PM 18 comments Older Posts Subscribe to: Posts (Atom) About Me Jules Hmmmm....Isn't this life's goal? To find out who we are? I want to be the person who is doing yoga on an Italian hilltop every morning while waiting for my vineyard to grow grapes for wine. Perhaps some day that will be my life. But for now, I'm a sarcastic girl who watches too much tv, sings off key, and finds shanking jokes funny. View my complete profile Help Haiti Now! Stalk Me on Facebook Mean Girl GaragePromote Your Page Too Studio Thirty Plus Visit Studio 30 Plus I appreciate it if you enjoy what you read and see. But I'd appreciate it more if you wouldn't steal it. Visit Thirty-Something Bloggers Blog Archive ▼ 2010 (19) ▼ January (19) Blasphemy is Funny 'Out of Tune Idol' Week 3 Results Show Dear President Obama/My Man, 'Out of Tune Idol' Week 3! Because I'm TOTALLY Lazy.... Go Vote for the Studio 30 + Blogger Awards! 'Out of Tune Idol' Week 2 Results Show COPS, Up Close... Judges' Comments 'Week 2 Out of Tune Idol' Week 2 - Out of Tune Idol One Signed Chuck Norris Book = One Stuffed Wax Cig... Why I Love You the Most Go Panda Go!!! Out of Tune Idol - Week #1 Results Show Out Of Tune Idol - Week #2 THIS Monday Sucks Babies! Complete and Utter Randomness Be a Cool Kid 10 Things ► 2009 (248) ► December (25) I Got An Award and You Can too!! To My 30 + Peeps. Out of Tune Tuesday - Imaho has a Stalker... Bad T... My Laziness Really Should Pay Off "I just paid four hundred dollars to watch you dro... ONE WEEK for the 'Out of Tune Idol' Videos!!! Dancing Christmas Away!! SANTA!!!!! I Am Moving to One of 40 Other States Out of Tune Tuesday - Imaho Gets it On with Frosty... If You Live On the East Coast, I Don't Like You To... And The Loser, I Mean, Winner Is....... (And Blog ... Bristol Does Tiger You're Kinda Needy....But So is Sarah Palin Out of Tune Tuesday - Santa Baby and F*cked Up Gif... Palin Gifts Out of Tune Tuesday Idol Sign Ups Gnome Sex Toys for Everyone! Famed Out Out of Tune Tuesday - Where I Toot My Own Horn... I Give Up. My Holiday Letter with Love Spanksgiving Things I'd Rather Do Than Go to Work Today Out of Tune Tuesday - Barry White ► November (18) Shanksgiving Grandma's Not So Secret Peanut Butter Pie Recipe My List of Thankfulness is Unending Holidays with Jules and Hubby Out of Tune Tuesday - But If You're Not Depressed,... Sarah Should Have Used the Dictionary... ► October (22) ► September (21) ► August (16) ► July (21) ► June (17) ► May (21) ► April (19) ► March (23) ► February (26) ► January (19) Other Mean Kids Cheesecake The Vegetable Assassin The Pop Eye BugginWord car dancing Lemon Gloria Jenny On the Spot: Caffeinated mom, lover of dancing, glitter and glitter. Tristachio: Not A Peanut Lisa and Laura Write Genius Pending Lets have a cocktail... just putting it out there... Lizabee & co. Hip Hop Hippie, Sucka A Little Blog About Nothing Scary Mommy What I Should Have Said Life with Kaishon Yo Mama's Blog It Was Dark, Stormy and I Lost My Serial Comma Wizard of Otin Mental Poo Wait in the Van The Circus has Come to Town BrazenBareToe Pacing The Panic Room Calling People Names Tangles Out Livit, Luvit Blogging is for Dorks Under The Sheets-shhh Random Esquire What Were You Thinking? KeepingYouAwake Herding Cats It's like I'm... mmmagic! Well okay, Sassy Britches! Libby Logic Sarah Bellum's Tales of Wit and Charm Lemmonex I'm not Benny Yellow Trash Diaries Steam Me Up, Kid... TheBloggess.com Dysfunction Junction My Wildlife's Words Seattle Education 2010 the yellow factor Prosy on Toast The Monster Apathy Blah Blah Blog Cleaning the Windows Nancy Pearl Wannabe Peter Sagal - Blog Double Trouble PostSecret I Didn't Get The Message mother hides the pearls Checking The Electrical Box. The Coconut Diaries hazy pink thoughts Chelsea Talks Smack As I Was Saying Dancing With A Full Deck trippin through life Alls I Know The House That Booms Built Those Who Love a Mean Girl You DO Love Me! You Should See Me Dance..... Thank you Miss Yvonne! I'm a Jane Goodall Fan too... Critty Critty Bang Bang is Lovely!! I Do Teach Kids... Thanks Yankee Girl! I'm Fab-u-lous! Why Thank You, Laura! Like I'm Doing Charity... Hit 40 Rocks!! Is Too Much Honesty a Good Thing?? From the Wonderful JennyMac I Give GOOD Blog I Love the JennyMac I Add Vodka to Mine... The Lovely Yankee Girl Gave this.... Awesomeness is Me Love you ClaireMontgomeryMD and Laura Fucking Fabulous Award Lady Jane and Yankee Girl Header Image by Vic - d92ff543c4ed1b15047e7edc4ff706cd1944f71e6bca034e09574bd6980648a3
-
(What's this?)
WNYUY-4UAHP-FXYPD
