THE PAST HOW IT MAKES ME WEEP I try so hard to shake the past But it still flickers through my mind, That little girl that I do see Herself she still cant find. The pain she feels tears through her Like a knife so sharp she screams, Why did he do those awful things When he comes close it makes her squeam. She feels his breath upon her face Her eyes shut tight to hide, He gropes her body until it hurts “You're daddy's girl, oh how he lied”. With tears that stain her little cheeks Too afraid to make a sound, Like a monster he envelopes her And takes her, to him she's bound. She only wishes for happy times To be free to smile and have fun, But her sombre look takes hold of her There's no joy, no love, just none. She tries so hard to hide her fears And keeps them deep inside, But one day they will erupt in her And to someone she will confide. With my eyes I see her tiny face I cry for her each night, I want so much to hug her close And tell her it will be alright. But sadness is all I see in her And the pain that she did feel, Of the emptiness that did strangle her Why did it have to be real? Where does it say that someone Can abuse a child so small? Relentless probing fingers She was frozen, she was held in thrall. It still sickens me to envision it As an adult it still hurts so deep My mind it wanders amilessly To the past, how it makes me weep. I don't know when I will heal inside For that little girl in me, Is still too scared to open up Dear God please help set her free. Free to be her self again, With a sparkle in her eye, To have happy thoughts and pretty smiles And no more fears that make her cry. I end this here in hopes that I Will one day conquer my fears, And be able to show one little child That there IS hope, and no more tears. Written by Mary G.
